Micheal Scott's Bizarre Adventure
by tiny dundee 2
Summary: reposting cause i lost my old account. tHIS STORY IS ABOUT SSSSEEEEEEEEXXXXXXXXXX! Actually the story is about This :Micheal Scott is torn up about Holly Flax leaving. he doesn't know what to do with himself until a mysterious arrow arrives in the office which will change DUNDER MIfflin forever
1. Chapter 1: prologue

Michael sat in his office, depressed. The perfect woman for him had left him, he had no one, Jan won't return his calls, he tried calling the benihana girl but accidentally called her sushi instead of her real name. He checked on The Chair Model Lady but she was still dead. Michael had no one. Suddenly a knock on his door, it was his loyal number two, Dwight

"may I come in?" Dwight asked

"no, Dwight." 

"don't be sad Michael, in the Schrute family, it was expected a man take at least 6 wives during his life, it was easier since most women didn't live past age 25 and to ensure he would have plentiful children to work the farm and in some cases, food…'

"oh god, Dwight, get out of here! I'm feeling bad enough already! I don't need to hear your weird Nazi cannibal family stories!"

"I'll have you know that only happened twice during a very harsh winter and Grandpa Manheim was just following Orders! His grandmother was actually Jewish" Screamed Dwight as he stormed out the room.

Michael put his hands in his head, inching closer to the dark place. He heard another knock, it was Lonnie, the receptionist he hates. He hated her because she wasn't the person she was meant to replace. She did have Pam's smile, Pamela's hair, Pan's laugh, Spam's body, Pama lama ding dong's breasts. Also, she couldn't work a fax machine to save her life.

"what is it, Lonnie"

"I'm dropping off a package also I', leaving"

"OK! But who's it from?"

"doesn't say"

Michael picked up the long box and opened it. Inside was a longbow and a single golden arrow. Upon seeing it he quickly shut the door and picked up the arrow and knew exactly what he was gonna do


	2. Chapter 2: Arrow

Michael walked into the office eating a giant cinnamon sugar Pretzel that he dipped in butter he glances around the room realizes no one cares for him like holly did but he will make them care.

"Ryan!" said Michael, "why don't you pull up that laptop and video chat pam for me?"

"why?' asked Ryan

"Just get it Ryan! God!".

Toby walked over and saw what Michael was doing.

"Michael, you can't order your coworkers to make a personal phone call during office hours."

Enraged by this Michael throws a copy of American Murder Stories,

"SHUT THE F[BEEP] UP, TOBY!"

Toby backed off scared. The laptop started dialing and the screen name "pamalamadingdong" The screen flashed and pam appeared.

"Hey, Spamster" said Michael.

"how did you get my email, Micheal?"

"It doesn't matter Paaaaaam!"

Cut to Jim: "I may have left my email up was gonna send her some cute little ecards, I have made a huge mistake"

"Would anyone in this room and pam even care if died right now?" exclaimed Michael. Phyllis speaks up "A lot of people would, Michael" "Of course you would, Phyllis! You have those grandmotherly instincts. But look at Stanley over there!" Stanley was too focused on his crossword puzzle to even notice anything. "Stanley" said Michael as he walked over to him. "I could be gone at any moment, but your crossword puzzle would still be there could you pay attention PLEASE!?" "Not if I finish this puzzle first" replied Stanley. Michael tries to grab the puzzle away from Stanley but he gave him a stare that contained the fury of 1000 suns. Michael backs off. " I really didn't want to do this" whispered Michael as he headed back to his office to grab the bow and arrow. As soon as he walks back out, everyone (except Stanley) starts screaming at him to put the bow down. He refuses has he nocks the arrow and places it under his chin while crying. "you really shouldn't bring weapons into the office Michael." Says Toby as he inches closer. "SHUT UP TOBY IF I WANT TO END ALL I WILL! YOU TELLING ME NOT TO ONLY MAKES ME WANT TO DO IT MORE THERE IS NO GOD, NO DIOS, NO JOHAVA, NO YAWEH, NO ALLAH!" Michael anguishes "NO OFFENSE, TURBAN, I KNOW HOW YOU PEOPLE GET". Turban the I.T guy who is busy installing porn blockers on Kevin's PC while he's distracted "I'm Sikh" replied Turban. "FINE LEAVE AT THIS CRITICAL MOMENT IF YOU'RE FEELING THAT SICK!". Dwight stands up and tries to grab the bow from Michael, but his hand slips and causes the arrow to launch and shoot into Michael's neck and exit from his skull.

Cut to Creed: "I attempted suicide once. Taking the jump was the best decision I ever made but an arrow that's stylish

All the women and Andy are screaming at the top of their lungs. Dwight is cradling Michael in his arms crying, Jim is splattered in blood, Shocked.

"SON OF A BITCH" screams Stanley "He got me to pay attention."


	3. Chapter 3: Awakening

A car is driving down the road to the hospital. It cuts to interior of the car, Jim is driving

"yeah, so miraculously, Michael survived, and the doctors said he's recovering well. He should be discharged. We're going to hospital now to see him. Hmm? oh I forgot" The camera turns, and we see Pam and Andy.

"I had to come. Jim picked me up on the way so" said Pam

"I'm coming just to give the boss man support. Man, we should have picked up a card, you know of those musical ones" piped Andy from the backseat

"Yeah, couldn't find one, maybe I should have looked in the "tried to kill yourself in the middle of the office with an arrow " section" replied Jim

The three eventually arrived and entered the waiting room, where Creed, Stanley, Toby, and Oscar are waiting. Cut to Stanley

"yeah I showed up, why is the surprising? I care about Michael plus I wanted to know how many days he's gonna be in the hospital."

A nurse appears "He's awake now, you guys can come in"

Stanley gets up and a Florida travel guide falls out of his suit jacket. Once inside everyone stops and see Michael laying in a bed with an IV inside his arm, his hair slightly stained from the blood but the arrow wound is completely gone despite getting injured only a few hours ago. Next to him Dwight is sleeping, looking incredibly disheveled despite only being there for an hour. The group greets Michael and wake up Dwight. Michael is elated to see everyone, but his mood turns sour once he sees Toby.

"Oh god I wish that arrow killed me" Groans Michael

"nice to see you to Michael. How are you feeling?" spoke Toby

"I was doing fine. Hey how come Ryan didn't show up?" asked Michael

Cut to Ryan at the office

"Oh I really wanted to go but Kelly had… something important like really important

Cut to Kelly

"Oh my god, Ryan for the first time agreed to watch Keeping up with the Kardashian with me! He always that show was mindless drivel and only appeals to the lowest common denominator. I mean he was supposed to go to see Michael, but he convinced Creed to go Instead"

Cut to Creed

"Oh I love hospitals, especially now that I get lord over the sick because I'm gonna let you in on a secret" He pulls out a stone mask with a vampiric face on it "I'm immortal thanks to this thing. Yep got it a garage sale. All I gotta do is put beet juice on it and it works." He pours a jug of beet juice on it and puts it on his face. Nothing happens

Oscar then asks, "so the doctors said you should be good to come back tomorrow." Stanley quietly curses under his breath "I mean your MRI scans are unreal, they show no sign of any damage. How'd that happen Michael?"

"I don't know Oscar. I'm just happy you're all here! Jim, Dwight, Pam, Andy, you, Stanley, 「tiny dancer」

"wait, who" asked Jim

"yeah I'm shocked Stanley put down his crossword puzzle to come and see me"

"After that. What dancer"

"Oh pffft I forgot to introduce him, Tiny Dancer! He's my pet ghost or stand as I like to call it cause all he does is stand" Michael laughs at his own joke. "come on he's right next to Stanley" everyone looks at the spot next to Stanley but no one sees anything except Pam who immediately notices a giant version of a Dundee standing next to Stanley.

"oh my god I see him too!" exclaims Pam as she notices the giant, golden, faceless man in a suit. It reminds her of a Dundee

"haha very funny Beesly" says Jim

"I'm not joking Jim. I know what he's talking about! I have a stand too"

Cut to jim

"so either Michael and Pam came up with a prank together or they actually have super powers, and honestly I don't know what's more unbelievable"

An aura glows around Pam as she summons her stand 「BAD ROMANCE」. What appears to be a tall obsidian woman with gold markings across her, draped in a large white cape with long, wavy red hair, and a violet leotard with straps. Pam then stretches her arms and point towards the sky.

"behold my Stando Powa!"

"why are you posing like that?" questioned Jim

"You can't still see it after all that!?"

"maybe it's for the better. He'd probably try to sleep with me" said Bad romance

"BOOM ROASTED!" yelled Michael as pam tried to shush her. While Pam and Michael are arguing Dwight looks on in envy

Cut to Dwight

"I. DON'T. GET IT. Ever since I was a teen, I always wanted powers and they get them!? I'm will fix this" Dwight storms off and approaches the counter where a nurse is working on a computer.

"Hi, can I help you?" asked the nurse

"Hello, I'm with a lackawana police department and I need the arrow that was used in the recent suicide attempt" He leans in closer "and you if refuse, I will have you arrested"

The nurse immediately takes out the arrow from underneath her chair and gives it Dwight. He then proceeds to stab himself with the arrow in the leg. The nurse screams and tries to help him but Dwight stops her and pulls it out of his leg. "I'm gonna go home now and summon my stand"

Cut to Dwight in his house

"No my stand hasn't come in yet but I've never felt better" Dwight immediately faints.


	4. Chapter 4: Stands

**STAND NAME ****「****TINY DANCER**」

Power - C

Speed - A

Range - B

Durability - A

Precision - C

Potential – C

STAND USER: Michael Scott

The next day, everyone is working in the office. Work is going smoothly despite the appearance of supernatural powers in the office. The camera zooms in on Pam who is fielding calls at her receptionist desk.

Cut to Pam

"yeah I went back to Scranton. I dropped out of art school because no one there has stands! By the way, I've always known about stands, my family has a few users. I just never mentioned it because I would sound crazy and I'm pretty sure talking grounds for sending me to the insane asylum. It's weird that I developed my stand like a few days. That doesn't happen unless a powerful user awakens nearby. Huh?

Jim and Dwight are sitting at their desks, Dwight is leaning back in his chair in a smug manner

"Hey Jim" says Dwight

"what is it, Dwight?" asked Jim

"How does it feel to be powerless and not in an exclusive club of only the elite in this office, and Pam?"

Pam is visibly mad

"Mhmmm kinda hurts that I don't have a pet ghost. What do you call it again? A squat?"

"A STAND, JIM"

"Yeah was it worth it though? I mean the nurse said you were only person in medical history to almost die from a toe injury"

"I STABBED MY TOES! Also, the nurse said I recovered within 40 minutes"

"yeah it pretty impressive you only cried for 40"

"DAMMIT JIM! It was worth it, and I will show you." He stands up "oh no I forgot my delicious snack of deer jerky! If only there was some way, I could teleport it to here! OH WAIT!"

Dwight then starts posing, he lifts his arms above his head and summons his stand. A alabaster, buff man with a dark red large beet for his head dressed in purple and green lederhosen appears, It then punches the air and creates a portal with his punch, It reaches into the deep blue swirling portal and pulls out a bag of deer jerky and places into Dwight's open hand. Dwight then eats in the jerky in the most dramatic pose.

Jim replies sarcastically "so you can make meat appear..."

"NO JIM!" Dwight proclaims, "I CAN SUMMON ANY THING FROM MY FARM!"

Jim looks incredulous.

"as long as it's under 10 pounds"

"But you can send stuff back? Now that would be impressive"

Dwight opens his mouth to reply but then starts thinking about the limits of his stand. He can't do that. Just then Michael calls from his office "Jim I need you in my office" as soon as Jim closes the door before he reacts Michael spear chucks the arrow into Jim's shoulder causing him to fall over in pain, "Don't worry you gonna get super powers!" assures Michael. Pam sees this and runs to the door she holds Jim who is in pain and blacking out but not before looking at Dwight and saying with a pained but faint and happy grin "Guess I'm in the club now" and he faints Dwight glances at the camera in rage.

cut to Dwight

"if Jim thinks he can be in the club of stand user then I'll sure everyone is in the club then there is no club"

Dwight walks in and takes the arrow from Jim's shoulder. "Michael, I am going to turn everyone into a stand user, and I will increase productivity in this office.

"Oh, that's a great idea, Dwight!" Michael says eagerly

Cut to Michael

"I love my stand and I think everyone should get one. I mean before I had one, I usually had to decide between sending funny emails or taking important phone calls from corporate. Now I don't!

Cut to Dwight talking to Ryan

"Hey Ryan, you want superpowers!?" asked Dwight. Ryan just stares at Dwight and says "DWIGHT! I don't what is it this ability is. To take others life or the power to manipulate others or maybe its understanding powerful movies. You know power is like water it can refresh you or drown you"

"So, you don't want the powers" Dwight replies.

"NO, I DO IM JUST EXPLAINING THE SACRIFICE THAT WOULD BE MADE FOR IT!" screams Ryan.

Dwight stares at him and stabs him with a blank expression "I'm getting some water" Dwight says while Ryan falls over and foams at the mouth. Suddenly Kelly grabs Dwight's arrow out of his hands.

"Uhm why does Ryan get a stand and I don't?!" questioned Kelly?

"Because you would waste it on something stupid like using it watch more episodes of Hollywood report"  
Enraged by this, Kelly immediately stabs the arrow through her chest and faints. Dwight nonchalantly takes the arrow and passes by toby who eyes the arrow.

"Hey Dwight, can I have a look at that arrow" askes Toby

Cut to toby

"Recently I've started writing a detective book series called _Chad Flenderson._ it's about this black man named Chad Flenderson who goes around solving crimes. He's oxford educated but also street smart and it's a very realistic and grounded book series. So I asked Dwight if he can give me a stand because it the newest book _Chad Flendseron and The Haunted Warehouse _he gets superpowers and I need powers in order to see what it's like."

Just then Michael appears behind Dwight. "NO NO NO! GOD NO!" Dwight turns around "why not, Michael?"

"Because Toby is a loser and a sad man. He would waste his stand and probably divorce it so give the arrow to me" Michael holds out his hand. Just as Dwight starts to hand the arrow, Toby lurches forward and grabs the arrow and stabs his hand with it. Michael tries to pry the arrow from him but his hand phases through.

Cut to Michael

"so yesterday when I was messing around with my stand, I found out I could summon up to 5 copies of myself. However, they cannot touch anything. And they disappear after someone punches them"

"Dammit, Dwight!"

Dwight makes his way to the accountants and goes up to Kevin

"Hey, Kevinnnn. Do you wanna try this Bavarian lollipop that my grandmother sent me" Asked Dwight

"That looks exactly like the arrow Michael almost killed himself with"

"I know! What a coincidence. Come one try it"

Kevin apprehensively licks it and immediately cuts his tongue on it.

"What the hell, man!?" whines Kevin who falls unconscious. Dwight turns around and faces the rest of the accountants. Oscar and Angela sight and roll down their sleeves. Dwight pricks both of their arms and they pass out. He then walks pass Stanley and pokes him in the back who doesn't notice. Suddenly Andy called out to Dwight, "hey big man. I noticed you just gave my fiancé a stand and I was wondering if you can give me one too?"

"No Andy. You're too weak to handle it. The arrow would kill you."

"GIVE ME A STAND DWIGHT." Yelled Andy as he took the arrow and stabbed himself, immediately exploding. Absolutely no one noticed but Phyllis. "Hey what just happened to Andy?" asked Phyllis. "Nothing" said Dwight as he threw the arrow into her chest. He immediately takes it out and finishes the last two employees in the office.

"OH MY GOD! Terry Crews just walked in here naked with a laaaarge erection" yelled Dwight

"Where?!" said Meredith turning around. As she was saying this, the arrow poked her in the forehead. "OW! Dwight!"

"superpowers!"

As Meredith stood up to fight Dwight, she immediately fainted. As Dwight passed by Creed's desked, He perked up as stopped Dwight, his eyes fixed on the arrow.

"you started mainlining in the office too?" asked creed

"what? What are you?"  
"well let's chase the dragon together then partner"

Creed reaches into his desk drawer and takes out a rubber strip and wraps it around his bicep and lays down his arm. Dwight Reluctantly sticks the arrow in his arm.

"wow where did you get this, beet man? I'm feeling dizzy already" says creed as he slips into darkness.

Dwight looks around and sees all the comatose bodies. "who else am I missing?" ponders Dwight as Darryl walks in "I've got a package fo- What the Fu-" Darryl gets cut off as Dwight chucks the arrow at Darryl's chest. He looks at the clock and packs up his bags. "see you tomorrow, Michael." Dwight says as he leaves. Michael steps out his office and sees all the unconscious office workers laying on the floor. "Guess I'll pay them for overtime" mutters Michael as he leaves too and turns off the light.

Cut to Michael

"yeah I'm excited to have a team of super powered paper sellers. This is the best thing since there were 3 Shrek movies instead of one. So yeah I'm Pretty confident that we're gonna be the best paper company in all of the east coast and nothing will tear this family apart"


	5. Chapter 5: Adventure

**STAND NAME ****「****WAYWARD SON**」

Power - C

Speed - A

Range - A

Durability - D

Precision - A

Potential – A

STAND USER Dwight Schrute

Michael is pacing back in forth in his office, nervously. The entire office is empty save for Dwight and Creed.

Cut to Michael

"They all left. Oh god, they all left. I thought they would stay but they left. They didn't even tell me they were. I came in and thought they were late but I saw the note. They all signed it." Michael starts tearing up. Cut to Dwight using his stand to field calls and Creed trying to look busy while buying a bunch of cameras online, purple thorny vines wrapped around his arms.

Cut to Creed

"yeah, my stand just came in and it's strange, I'm able to use Hamon with it and even take pictures, though it sucks I have to smash my cameras too use it. I think I'm gonna call it Hermit Purple." Then Creed puts on the mask and rubs beet juice on it "oh you're asking what I'm doing? Well this is how I keep my immortality. My hamon mastery wasn't enough to keep off aging forever. Man it only feels like yesterday 100 years ago when I started my training.

Suddenly Michael gets a call from David Wallace and he answers trying to hold back tears.

"Dunder-Mifflin this is Michael"

"yeah Michael I'm just wondering why almost everyone in your branch immediately quit on the same day"

"they all thought they were too good after they got their stands. And they left."

"Michael, what the hell is a stand?!"

"it's a pet ghost that punches things

"what? What does the even- never mind I don't want to know. Look Michael, as much I hate to admit it, you're our most profitable branch and without your workers, Dunder-Mifflin as a whole will be bankrupt in a month"

"so, what do you want me to do about it?"

"I'm asking you to get your employees back. I don't care how you do it Michael. Just save the company"

Cut to Michael

"so, David Wallace has asked me to go on an adventure. A sort of bizarre adventure. My bizarre adventure. Yeah that's what I'm gonna call it"

Michael exits his office and motions for creed and Dwight to get up

"Dwight, I need you to find everyone"

"ok Michael. Just let you know that even an expert manhunter such as me could take months, evens years finding that many people"

Suddenly Creed summons his stand and karate chops a camera. A photograph of a disheveled Andy covered in rags outside of Broadway comes out the remains.

"here you go boss" Says Creed as he hands Michael the photograph

"you can do that? Just punch a camera and find people?" asks Michael

"yes and I can use it spy on people in the mens bathroom"

"whatever so if Andy is in New York so should the rest of the workers!"

Michael then took his keys

"well I guess we're going to New York and a bizarre adventure to save the company.

Michael, Creed, and Dwight then jumped into Michael's Sebring and started their long drive to New York.

Cut to David Wallace in his office at night working on expense reports, when the door is forced open. Wallace looks up in shock, "what are you doing back here?!" before David can press the security button under his desk, an icicle shoots through his chest. As he lays on the floor, bleeding out he looks up and cowers

"Jan please don't!"

Jan looks down on him, her eyes start glowing purple as she unloads her space ripper stingy eyes on him. Killing him instantly. Jan then sits down on his chair and picks up the phone. It rings a few times before it goes straight to voicemail "Hello you've reached Jim Halpert. I am not available right now so leave a message"

"hello Jim. I have a proposition for you. Would you like to be CEO of Dunder-Mifflin and destroy Michael Scott?! I'll be waiting on your call" Jan then hangs up and looks out the window and only one thought crosses her mind "I should get a new outfit and a second boob job."


End file.
